Do you need a coach or a psychologist?
One of the most common questions I’m asked is how are you different to a psychologist?
A psychologist focusses on why you are how you are. They focus on your past and determine whether you are suffering from any undiagnosed mental conditions. Psychologists also assist you if a general practitioner suspects you are suffering from anxiety, depression or any other mental health conditions. These conditions can be the root problem of why you lack self confidence and self esteem.
A coach on the other hand, helps you to focus on the present moment, how to maximise your potential and help you rediscover who you are at your core then assist you to live your best life day in day out. At Magnetic Confidence we specifically focus on helping you:
Identify what you think is holding your confidence back eg: current habits, time management, productivity
Discovering the thinking and beliefs that underpin why those habits, time management, productivity etc are not working for you
Help you to redefine your life so that you have a mindset that fosters the habits, belief and action you need to feel confident.
For many people redefining your life is not creating anything new but rather uncovering the things you want in life that have been hidden by a mound of responsibilities, your career demands, your children’s needs, the extra sleep you sneak in when you get a free minute or two and those damn societal expectations that pressure you to do certain things at certain times including neglecting your own self care.
We do this through a 3 part framework called the 3Rs because it’s literally as important as becoming literate.
R- Reflect. This is where you begin the initial stages of defining what is holding you back and how you go to this place of feeling unworthy, self conscious or a major procrastinator (as you often label yourself).
R- Refresh. During this stage we focus on updating your mindset (thinking, beliefs, attitudes) so that you engage with life differently right here and right now. Think of it as a wardrobe refresh but for your mind. It’s life changing, it helps you stand tall, love yourself, committ to self care regularly and start prioritising yourself.
R- Revive. Here is the time and place that you learn how to be embed self care practices into your life that help you to continuously feel confident, like you are growing, loving and respecting yourself.
Each one of these stages are just as important as each other. Everyday every individual needs to be finding space to reflect, refresh (where necessary) and revive themselves to help them be happier, healthier and more confident. When people see psychologists they are provided on strategies for here and now like coaches do but their main focus is ensuring that there is no hidden trauma or mental health issues that underpin your actions and thinking. Therefore coaches and psychologists work really well together.
When I have worked with clients who saw psychologists and came to me they noticed a significant difference. Clients often mentioned how both professions really support each other in peoples’ mental health. However psychologists and coaches are different. Psychologists are very well versed in how to help people with trauma, they have the training and capacity to help people rewire their thinking.
I know that you probably hear coaches talking about the importance of rewiring the brain for greater happiness so how can coaches talk about it like psychologists? Coaches and psychologists learn very similar things but coaches are focussed more on what is happening right now, its about being incredibly intentional about now. So when coaches, including myself, talk about rewiring the brain we are talking about how to change your current attachment to things by learning how to connect to others and your experiences differently. The quicker you do that the better. For those who have suffered trauma and need to see a psychologist (I will always recommend psychologists for my clients if I feel its needed) they will spend much more time digging deep into the past and changing how you have recorded moments in time in your life.
As the coach at Magnetic Confidence I do focus on some healing of trauma and I use techniques that psychologists and other coaches use such as Act Mindfulness and Self Compassion Therapy because these tools enable individuals to increase their intention and have greater happiness and health (especially mental health) today.
Coaches are sometimes not the first preference of individuals with mental health conditions because they don’t fully understand what we do or because psychology has been accepted in the global community for much longer. This is a fixed mindset in and of itself. It is akin to those who believe that a certificate or a degree will ensure an exemplary professional despite the world knowing about surgeons who left instruments in peoples’ bodies, teachers who assault children, tradesmen who do dodgy work hoping to get away with anything they can, personal trainers who run classes and never correct form causing injury and coaches that may have spent $30k+ on a certificate in advanced coaching metaphysics however they psychologically abuse their clients. A certificate doesn’t ensure that someone is more or less likely to give results, it doesn’t warrant credibility.
Everyone will chose who they want to work with based on what they are comfortable with, however when it comes to coaching the most important thing is that the individual feels they can trust the coach, the coach feels the client respects them and the coach gets RESULTS for the client not a certificate. Similarly, if an individual is going to a psychologist and is not getting results or doesn’t like that the psychologist reaches for medication in the first instance of hearing about someone’s challenges then you can walk away. Do what is best for you.
As a confidence coach I will 100% advocate for you choosing the professional you choose based on what you feel you need. Caring for people who want to feel loved and appreciated and experience a happier life is not about how many 1 on 1 clients are on my books. It’s not about a KPI target, its about CARE. Care about yourself enough to make a choice that fits you. Perhaps that’s seeing a coach, perhaps its seeing a coach and a psychologist or perhaps you need healing right now and a psychologist needs to be your first port of call. Whether you are talking to me or another coach you should know that a great coach is prepared to let you walk away for what you need.
