What moving house taught me about life

In January, I moved house. it was a full on experience of packing, unpacking, cleaning, sorting and organising across two places over several weeks. I do not like moving, but there’s a few things that I’ve learnt about life from my recent move that I wish to share with you. 

When I moved into my house, a whole 6 streets away from where I live now I kept looking at the spaces in which I lived in for the past 3 1/2 years, and all the memories that had been made. I became a mum or a dog mum for the first time in this home. I hosted my first ever Christmas, because for the first time I had my own space where I can invite family to come where I wasn’t sharing. I had my first home parties from Nutrimetics to lingerie parties and the like. I could recall how easy it all was to move into that place back in 2020 in the midst of a global pandemic. The previous owners were still living there, the furniture was placed perfectly for 60-year-olds but still, when I stepped into the space and knew how I would fit an element of me within that home, I knew how I would make it mine. It wasn’t a new home by any means, but it had plenty of space- space for everything. Space to relax in the front and the back of the house, a space for me to create my own gym, space for me and for Mia to play, space to renovate old furniture, a space to run my office from, and a great location that I would feel safe in. Once I’ve viewed the house, in about a minute I knew that I should move into that place. While I was renting, it reminded me of how I need to feel when I walk into a place that I wish to buy- which is my goal for 2024 (now that I know where I want to buy).

I loved my now previous home, I loved the space I had to myself, I loved that I had privacy and I loved that I could make it my own. However, there are a lot of things I didn’t love. I didn’t love the 1970s roller doors that would get stuck in their tracks day in day out. I didn’t love the garden, though beautiful it could easily look overgrown in a few days. I didn’t love the lack of ceiling fans or the fact that when it was hot, I needed to sleep in the lounge room because it was the only area with air conditioning.

Since moving, everything works! I no longer have to fight with 1970s roller doors. I no longer feel guilty if the garden doesn’t look perfect every day- to be honest, the garden was only ever suited to a 60-year-old anyway. I don’t have to put up with the heat any more thanks to ducted air conditioning and my sleep is better. I have several spaces to entertain and I enjoy time on my own. Mia can see me in all areas of the house, she’s relaxed. Most of all Mia and I do not hear abusive arguments almost every day any more…thank goodness!

This made me think a lot about my goal of buying a place and what I really want. There are some things you can control and some things you can’t in life. You can find something quickly that’s good enough, but the difference when you find something that is exactly what you want is phenomenal. It has a massive impact on your mindset, one that I didn’t fully appreciate until I felt ease in my new home. Little annoyances or things not working properly being entirely eliminated, gives you a brand new state of being (headspace), that you’ve never had before and its highly underrated.

This made me realise that renting or buying a home is a lot like building confidence except the home is your mind, body and soul. You can decide that what I have right now and how I feel is good enough, but until you upgrade your life, you never fully understand how much those little nuances itch away at how good you feel. You don’t really realise how much those little frustrations actually add up to big frustrations and it’s really hard to foresee what life would be like without them, which is why so many people stay exactly where they are. They don’t change things, they stick with what they know and they look at other homes or other people wishing they had the luxury of something different, something better.

The reality is everyone has the opportunity for an upgrade. Some people buy a home purposely to upgrade it. They get something they know they’re gonna put in the effort to renovate and they spend the time doing it. They focus on it and only it and scarcely have a rest. After a while they’re so over renovations sometimes people sell and they go back to the kind of lifestyle they had before- a fixer upper. It’s the same with your confidence and self love. if you push so hard to change everything about yourself all in one go, sometimes it becomes easier to go back to what you know not what you want, or how you want to be. Some renovators love it; not only do they then finish renovating their home or upgrading their life, but they start helping others. I consider myself to be renovator. 

It’s really funny I’ve been looking at buying a home for a while now and I’ve looked at those that have really good bones, you know a structure you can work with and build on. As a coach, I help people renovate their lives while letting them identify for themselves what structure they need and the bones that will make the foundation of their life better. However as a coach, I can’t make anyone decide that they want to work on themselves. It’s like a home renovator who can’t be forced to start renovating the kitchen. They have to do it themselves, they have to want to see that the heart of the home once improved is going to make the biggest difference to their life. It’s the same for the heart in our bodies. When we spend time on our hearts, our physical body changes, our brain develops, our mindset changes, the energy through our body changes and we showcase that through the way we walk, talk and interact with others.

Even though I’ve been renovator of hearts for nine years now  I never realised that specific connection between a material desire that I have, and a being desire that I have. I think its a powerful metaphor that allows you to recognise what you love, what you don’t and what you put up with (that you most likely don’t need to). So I encourage you, the next time you’re walking through a doorway and get stuck again or the fridge doesn’t open properly because the cabinet isn’t big enough to fit the fridge with ease, start thinking about how often you accept things in your life that frustrate you and whether you truly are prepared to put up with them for the rest of your life. If you’re not willing to put up with them, click the button below have a coaching call with me and learn how you could become a renovator as well.